today got to noe my overall results le. all i can say is i feel very very sad. i dun expect myself to still do so badly. i started to get very very sad in class. people around my area are all top ten ppl. they are all saying that they deproved. i am wondering so wat is a position of 34 determines? i just feel so horrible, i think i am the most stupid ppl on the earth. is like why? i put in my best to do it. i studied so hard eveyday till midnight, 2 plus, i expect just to get at least the top 30 but i can't, wat's wrong with me? is it just plain stupid lor? ppl encouraged me by telling me that i had improved, but only by 1 or 2 position, is still as bad. cindy and xiuzhen came to tok to me telling that they did as bad, but i am still sad, compare to sec one sec two i had already dropped a lot. is like from the sky to hell. is like oh my god lah. but i noe being sad now has no point, its already fixed. all i can do now is to buck up. i hope next year i would not have these results. ):
so went to the brunei meeting with a very heavy heart. went into the room and sat down there with haikel. soon thuya and raygin joined. they asked me y i so sad, i didn't say anything and they guessed is my results, i nod my head and start crying, i say that partly is also because of my position. they started to comfort me telling me that is not the position that matters, is whether i can get promoted or not. they say this is not the last lap, we still have 'o' levels. stefanie, lishewn, charmaine, huishi, camelia and gina came to comfort me also. but i just feel lousy. they say that i am in a competitive class that's y. these ppl really make me feel better. is nice to have them as friends lah. thanks for being there when i am sad.
after i cooled down, i started to wrote my reflection for the brunei presentation. ps lah got a bit long. then mam distributed the slides to each of us. went home with haikel after that cos i dun even wan to get c the sc interview le! ok watever. it was raining. i told haikel i wanted to walk in the rain but i didn't tell him the reason. actually i just hope that after walking under the rain, i would feel better and more relaxed, and indeed i felt so. the rain had washed away some of my sorrows, lols. thanks haikel for walking with me under the rain like some retards. thanks. went home and dad went to fetch mum from work, suddenly felt that head very heavy, think i caught a cold, but nevermind is all worth it, at least i dun feel so lousy now.
after getting all my lousy results, i realised that i have a lot of good friends around me. thanks ppl for encouraging me, i really felt much better now. i will work harder for my 'o' levels next year and try to get into top 30 in class. but first i have to pass my amaths retest. i will buck up together with cindy. ppl like stefanie, sweeyan, cailing and darren say that they will help me. thanks ppl. thanks for those ppl huu comforted me today also! great thanks. i will work hard and promised i wun cry next year! i would not let such small setbacks to defeat me! i will work harder!! cindy, 我们要一起加油了!!

Labels: thanks a lot ppl.

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